Let’s Be Real About Facebook Arguments

Ok, let’s be real about Facebook arguments. People all over the world are spending a significant amount of their time arguing with strangers on the internet. Why? What is the point in that? Facebook arguments tend to go a little something like this:


Person 1: “Hey! Does anyone know what time the event starts?”

Person 2: “It’s on the website. Maybe you should read it more closely.”

Person 1: “Haha ok. I did read it closely. Maybe you should mind your own business.”

Person 2: “You’re the one who asked.”

Person 1: “Well, I didn’t ask for your attitude, bitch.”

Person 2: “I hope you get AIDS and die.”

Person 1: “I hope your mother kills herself when she realizes what a piece of shit you are.”

Person 2: “I actually feel sorry for you. You must have a very sad life.”

Person 1: “I feel sorry for you if the only thing you care about is arguing with strangers on the internet. I have better things to do. I’m going to go save three-legged orphaned kittens now. Have a blessed day.”

Person 2: “I’ll pray for you to become a better person. Love and light.”


The only thing you’ve established here is that you’re both assholes. Someone will ask a simple question or state their opinion and then someone else will come at them with the fire of a thousand suns. Yet somehow, it ends with everyone talking about their blessed lives and praying for each other. If a Facebook post has 50+ comments on it or a comment has 50+ replies to it, then you best believe that I’m grabbing snacks and hitting the couch to fully indulge myself in their childish banter. I honestly can’t think of anything more entertaining than reading arguments between strangers on the internet. It escalates so quickly, like someone lit a match and threw it in a can of gasoline.

I’ll shirk all of my responsibilities to spend an hour reading each and every comment on a Facebook argument, but I would never participate in one. I just don’t understand the point of it. You get yourself all fired up over what some stranger is saying to you and next thing you know you’re having a fucking stroke because your blood pressure is through the roof. Seriously, what’s the point in that? Are you doing it solely to entertain the likes of me? Because if so, then carry on. By any and all means, please do carry on. Just know that I like my Facebook arguments quick and dirty. Don’t be afraid to go straight for the jugular. Turns out I’m no better than the rest of you.


women typing on the notebook





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